To Fill or Not to Fillm

In another month it will be my 1 year bandiversary! It's hard to believe that time has passed by so quickly! I'm excited for what's in store next as I think these last 35 pounds will really show the difference that I'm wanting to see in my figure. I know I need to be more dedicated and put more work in and I have a plan in place for doing so.


Number 1, at my new school there is a nice big track so I'm thinking when it's not too cold outside, after the kids get out I could walk/jog for the 30 minutes I have remaining in my day. That way the exercise is over before I get home and I can make excuses not to get up. I'm also going to do some more investigating into the gym thing. I really want to join Pensacourt and I found out that I can get a discount through either one of my jobs. The good thing about the Pensacourt is they actually do an assessment of your fitness level when you join. So they measure your fat, muscle, etc. and work to help you set up a plan. I like that little bit of coaching and feel it could be useful to me. They also have a ton of fun fitness classes like bootcamp, Zumba, water aerobics. I actually like group classes cause everyone can complain together *LOL*

Number 2 is my diet which I think is actually pretty good. Since the incident I will refer to as the "Great Halloween Reeses Cup Ingestion of 2009" I've been pretty good about staying away from sweets. However, I've noticed, especially in the last week, that I feel like I'm starving all the time. I am so hungry even 2 hours after I just ate! It's driving me nuts! I'm scheduled to go back in to the doctor around my 1 yr mark but I don't know if I can wait that long. Should I call and go back now? I don't want to gain a bunch before then! Advice ladies please. Let me tell you what I can eat. I can eat a whole bowl of cereal, I can eat 2 pieces of PAN pizza, I can eat a bowl of rice and chicken, etc. Doesn't that seem crazy? I read these posts from people only eating 1/2 cup of food and I want to die! So the question is to fill or not to fill?

Busy, Busy, Busy!

Christmas is just around the corner and I have barely anything done yet at this point! I did get some shopping for the kids completed but I still have quite a bit to finish. Luckily, I looove to shop especially when I have the money to do so and not worry about how I'm going to pay for everything. This 2nd job has allowed me that freedom and I'm actually not stressed about paying for Christmas this year. Do you know how good that feels?


Let me tell you a little story. Every year, I have an emotional breakdown in the Toys R Us parking lot come mid-December. Without fail, you can plan to see me in my car dry heaving with mascara running down my face. I always want to do so much for my kids. I know it's not necessary and they will be happy no matter what they get. It's myself putting the pressure on. I grew up really poor and, little known fact, but I'm the first person in my entire family (read grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles, mother, father, etc) to graduate college. So, I have more means to provide than my family did. I think I want to do everything for my kids that I never had and sometimes I go overboard. There's probably a therapy session just waiting for me out there!

So for those of you who were confused about my job status (waves at Mary), hopefully this will clear it up. I have worked full time at the health department for 2 years. One of those years I was a school nurse which I loved but I had difficulty because school nurses are not paid during the summer and at that time I couldn't find alot of summer work around here so I switched to Healthy Start department, which is basically a program for at risk pregnant women. I grew to hate the job. Lots of referrals from Department of Children and Families for abuse, drugs, etc. I had to do home visits and most were in less desirable parts of town. I even had a man come at me one time and try to grab my name tag from around my neck. I just didn't feel safe in that job. So, I found out from a friend about a position in the nursery at the hospital. Nurses have the ability to work PRN shifts, which means as needed. I give the hospital my availability and I work when I want to make extra money. I'm required one shift per month but I can work above that. As a result of getting the nursery position, I was able to go back to school nursing! So, to break it down for you, I work full time as a school nurse and part time as a nursery nurse. Alot of explanation for something rather simple! *LOL*

Last night, I worked at the nursery and we were BUSY! It's 12 hour shifts over there and I ended up working about 14 hours during which I maybe sat for 1 hour tops to do my charting. In fact, while I was sleeping this afternoon, I got some really bad cramps in my legs. You know the type you get when you exercised really hard the day before? I'm thinking all this running around will be good for the weight loss!

If it wasn't for bad luck, I wouldn't have luck at all!

Lots of updates to write here. I went to the urologist and promised to tell you about that so here it goes. I had a long talk with Dr. Sehkon and he doesn't believe the lapband contributed to my stone unless, of course, I wasn't drinking enough water. I can tell you, I drink loads of water. Every morning I always have 2 cups of coffee and then it's water throughout the work day until I get home when I may have 1 glass of decaf/unsweet tea. He believes it may be hereditary as my grandpa has had loads of stones. When I went back for my checkup, my stone was still there. He found it really strange that it was no longer bothering me. He decided against going in after it since I seem to be feeling ok. It may pass in the next couple of months. As far as prevention, here's what he recommended. Drink lots of water, drink a glass of lemonade, grapefruit juice, or orange juice daily, and don't salt your food. I am seriously failing when it comes to the salt. I have a terrible salt addiction and I know how bad it is for me. I was raised by a salt addict. My mom would salt all my food growing up and I have acquired a taste for it. I've decided that I will work on lowering my sodium sort of as my New Year's resolution. Strangely enough, my New Year's resolution has always been to lose weight and this year it's not. I feel like that's a small victory in and of itself!

In other news, I was scheduled to work last night and when I woke up from my nap (I'm working nights), I felt awful. My body was hurting, chest felt like I had an elephant on it, and my head was pounding. I thought about calling off but this was only my 3rd night working and I don't want them to think I'm unreliable so I took some medicine and dragged myself in. I was doing my first assessment on my baby when I felt this wave of nausea come over me. I thought, "Oh God, I am going to puke here at work." I sat down for a bit and it passed. I tried to ask the other nurses if I could go on home but one seem really irritated (nurses are not the nicest people). So, I tried to truck on but then my head just really started throbbing and I felt hot. I took my temp and it was 101.5! I told them, " I have to go home, my temp just keeps going up." I came back to the house and loaded myself up on medicine and slept. I didn't eat for 24 hours due to the nausea. I'm just now feeling better. I just hope my work doesn't stay pissed at me over having to leave. I really need this 2nd job! The only bright side is I lost 3 pounds due to this illness LOL Reminds me of Romy and Michelle's high school reunion when Romy says Mono was the best diet ever! Please take a look at my ticker. My BMI is 30.3, now only .3 away from just being overweight!! No more obesity! I'm going to try and lose the other 2 pounds this week so I can hit this milestone. Will keep you posted on my progress =)

Gobble, Gobble, Happy Thanksgiving!

I love this time of year! The holidays always put me in the best mood. I had a really good Thanksgiving for the most part. I woke up early that day and watched the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. I swear one year I'm gonna go to New York and watch the darn thing live! I cooked through most of the afternoon and then we trucked everything over to my parents. We had so much food cooked, it was nauseating! I ate a little bite of everything and actually that was too much. Unlike most bandsters who PB when they overeat, I get this incredibly bad pressure in my port and it pops out just like those buttons in the turkeys that you let you know it's done! It's strange thinking how I used to be able to eat 2nds and sometimes even 3rds. Just impossible to do now and I'm thankful for that.





I ended up working Friday night and last night, so I am exhausted! However, it was really good. I'm working as a nursery nurse. This is the new job (2nd job) that I was telling you all about. I stayed really busy and even managed to lose those pounds I had gained over the whole kidney stone incident (will make a separate post to fill you in on that visit with the MD)! I also happened to have the biggest NSV. I ran into a buddy of mine from nursing school at work last night. I saw him as I was catching the elevator and I screamed, "Hey Joey!" He gave me this quizzical look and I realized he did not recognize me! I had to say, "It's me, Melissa!" He was floored. He grabbed me and gave me a huge hug and said "You look so good! I didn't even recognize you!" I was on cloud 9 over that one all night.

And to top it off, I weighed in this morning at 180 exactly, so I'm officially 65 pounds down and I couldn't be anymore thankful for my band!

Another Kidney Stone Victim

Well, I have been MIA from my blog and for good reason, I had a terrible experience with a kidney stone. It all started on Monday. I went for my pre-employment physical and the nurse said "your heart rate is a little high and your temperature is up. Are you getting sick?" And I thought no, I feel fine and the rest of that day I did but on Tuesday I was at work and just not feeling right. Can't really put my finger on what was bothering me but I felt off. I had a couple of patients to see that morning and I dropped off a pack n play to my first one and after that visit I started noticing some pain in my back. I thought maybe I had pulled a back muscle maneuvering that pack n play. By lunch time the pain was starting to get bad so I canceled on my next patient and went back to the office. My coworker, Peggy, who is just the best sat with me while I tried to stretch my back out on the birth ball we have in our office. I took a couple of Tramadol pills (pain pills that I have for my migraines) and hoped that it would take the back pain away. Well, it helped and I made it through the rest of the day at the office.
When I got home that night, I noticed that I was having a weird feeling when I tried to go to the bathroom and instantly the thought popped into my head that I probably had a UTI since that could explain the back pain and the urination problem. So off I go to Publix to pick up some AZO pills and I tell myself I'll call Dr. French in the morning and get some antibiotics. Well, no longer than about an hour after I got home, the back pain became excruciating. I was bent over crying and I told Duane that I had to go to the ER because this was not right. So, he calls my dad and asks him to watch the kids while he takes me to WF ER. I remember telling my dad, we'll be back soon cause it's probably just a UTI *LOL* Oh how stupid was I?
So we get to the ER and now I can barely walk and I'm just crying. Of course, the damn place is packed with idiots who don't know what an ER is really supposed to be used for. I have to vent here because this is such a pet peeve of mine...DO NOT use the ER as your primary care physician. There were people there just laughing a joking around. Can you seriously be in need of emergency care when you're goofing around with your buddies waiting to see a doctor?!?!? This is why the people who truly need to be seen have to wait so damn long but I digress. There was another little gal (appeared to be a teenager) that I did feel sorry for. She and I were the only 2 people screaming and crying in the waiting room. Apparently, she had fallen while playing volleyball and hurt her ankle. I felt bad for her even through my own pain but we were both just having to sit there waiting our turn.
I couldn't get comfortable in my seat. I kept standing up and walking and then sitting down, crying and holding my back. Then all the sudden I started sweating profusely and this is in a hospital that everyone is wearing jackets because it's so cold. Then I felt faint and I sat down and looked at my husband and knew I needed a bucket like now. So that's when the vomiting started. Just a side note about vomiting. It's like I can't do it since being banded. I kept throwing up but it wasn't stomach contents, it was tons and tons of saliva. Weird, huh? So this goes on and on for over 2 hours while I wait to be taken back. Finally, they call my name and by now I am just moaning, groaning, screaming, yelling. etc. Let me just tell you that I had my first daughter with pitocin and no epidural and this pain was equal if not worse than that. I hope to never go through something like that again.
It was taking so long for the nurse or doctor to see me and I was being so mean to my husband. I kept yelling at him to get the nurse and tell her that I am dying. I need something for the pain right now. My poor husband would open the door and try to tell them that his wife was in an insane amount of pain. Finally, Dr. Gonzales (who is fantastic btw) passes by the room and he says, "honey, I think you have a kidney stone and I'm gonna get you something for the pain, just give me 1 minute." So, my nurse, Tiffany, comes in and starts my IV and gives me some medicine. It took about 20 minutes but finally the pain was gone. OMG, I felt like a different person. I apologized to everyone I had yelled at. I went to CT and they confirmed that I had a stone. It was blocking off my ureter and the urine and blood was backed up. It was almost to my bladder which is a good thing because that's apparently when the pain subsides. Dr. Gonzales said the stone was about 4 mm in size. He said I would be able to pass it on my own but I needed to follow up with a specialist. They gave me more fluids, some prescriptions for pain meds, and I was finally able to go home at about 5 am.
I've been at home for the last 2 days in a coma almost. I ended up sleeping for what seems like an entire day. Every time I got to the bathroom, I have to strain my pee. You're supposed to try and catch the stone so it can be analyzed by the urologist because certain foods can cause stones. I have to admit that I'm pretty sure the band contributed to the stone. I guess we'll have to wait and see what the urologist says. I feel terrible not in pain or anything but just washed out and depressed because my energy is down and I've been missing work and just gross because I've laid out on the couch for 2 days. UGH. I feel so bad because now I know what Bandita was going through. It's just horrible. I haven't passed the stone and I am thinking mine might have broken up into tiny fragments because I've been straining my urine for 2 days and nothing. I keep debating whether I should go into work tomorrow or just give myself the rest of the weekend to get better. I'm going to call the urologist and see about my appointment now. It might take me awhile but I plan to catch up on all the blogging I missed and if you made it through this whole post, Bless you!

Size 10...what?

I'm sitting here trying to recover from a very crazy weekend. Lyric's birthday was on Friday so we had a little party with family that night. I was half dead due to 3 hours sleep the previous night and the fact that I got both my flu shots that day at work (talk about sore arms). Then last night we went to Duane's parents for dinner. I was rushing around because I'm always running late and I picked up a pair of my old jeans and tried them on and to my amazement they fit. They are size 10's!!!!!!! I am so happy!! I haven't worn 10's since Lyric was about 3 years old *LOL* The only bad thing about all this weight loss is I have absolutely no clothes to wear. I feel like some type of street vagrant because I'm wearing whatever I can dig out of the closet. I plan to go shopping with my Christmas money so I only need to make due just a little while longer. So if you see me in Walgreens with an old stained white T shirt and some jeans, please be gentle.

Oh and I got the job!! I start on the 23rd! More money and smaller jeans make Melissa very happy =p

Feeling Much Better About Everything

So I think I was freaking out way too much the other day about my Halloween candy binge! I got back on track Monday and actually weighed myself and I had only gained a pound. Thanks goodness for that 5 K! I will tell you one thing I love about being banded. I know that I will always have slip ups with food but with the band it's like a controlled slip. I don't gain 5 pounds when I overeat like I would have in the past. I need to learn to let it go when I make a mistake and just focus on being better the next day. I'm bad about beating myself up.

I haven't posted about this yet but I'm a little scared that I might be having gallbladder issues. I have problems with going from either constipation to diarrhea since being banded. It's so annoying. And then twice in the last month I've had these "episodes" where I will feel like I have to go to the bathroom shortly after eating something but I can't go. Then I broke out in a cold sweat and thought I was going to die with really bad pain in my stomach. It's almost like how you would describe dumping syndrome but that's very uncommon in banded people. At any rate, my doctor's ordered an u/s of my gallbladder. Just hoping I don't have to have another surgery!

I had my interview today at the hospital and it went really well. The hospitals have these things called peer interviews so first you interview with the manager of the unit and then if she/he likes you, you have to be interviewed by the other nurses who work there. It's a little nerve wracking. I have to go to that interview this weekend. I'm really hoping they like me because this would be so good for me financially. And I've decided that if I go get this job, I'm gonna reward myself with a gym membership. I know I said I couldn't go before but I think I will have the time and the money if this new gig works out. I felt so good on Halloween after the 5 k and it reminded me that exercise can be fun, especially when you have a partner to work out with =)